Jaxson’s Ice Cream Parlour
128 S Federal Hwy, Dania Beach, FL 33305
Web Site: http://www.jaxsonsicecream.com
I just want to note that despite recent appearances on this blog, I do not eat hamburgers and massive ice cream sundaes every day of the week, OK? Okay.
So, a few weeks ago I found out that legendary Los Angeles foodie Chris Cognac was going to be visiting South Florida for a day prior to heading on a vacation cruise and then heading off to Orlando to engage in mouse-related stuff.
Chris and I have known each other for over 10 years, as he was one of the very first folks to register on eGullet.com. But in that time, we never had a chance to meet each other in person.
Given the hastiness of the information, we didn’t have a lot of time to plan an ideal get-together. It was further complicated by the fact there were wife and kids also in tow and we wanted a place pretty close to where they were staying. As it happened, their hotel near Fort Lauderdale International Airport was only minutes away from Jaxson’s in Dania Beach.
Now, Jaxson’s is not necessarily a foodie outlet. In fact, I’d call it anything but that. Specifically, the place is known for ice cream. Massive, massive amounts of ice cream served in gigantic portions designed to give seven year olds nightmares and tummy aches.
It’s the kind of place you go to when you are visiting your grandparents in Florida and they want to take you out — for ice cream. In fact, virtually all of the visits to Jaxson’s in my entire life span were with Jack and Sylvia Perlow, when I came to visit them during the 1970s and early 1980s when they were snowbirding in Hallandale.
Dinners were usually early birds at Pumpernick’s, Morrison’s or some other South Florida institution catering to seniors that has long been history. And yet Jaxson’s remains — because it appeals to everyone.
Despite the ice cream focus, Jaxson’s still serves a full menu, mostly dominated by sandwiches, burgers and comfort food types of things that you would see in a classic luncheonette. Except that everything is Jurassic Park sized.
The place is also frequently a mob scene unless you get there right before the big lunch and dinner rushes. Literally there is a line a hundred or so people long right in front, and there’s no way you’re gonna wait any less than an hour to get in to get your ice cream unless you specifically use the take-out window outside. The photo below was taken right before noon on a saturday. By the time we had left, it was extremely busy and there was a wait to get in.
Jaxson’s is the place to be in South Florida for massive ice cream creations. Click on the “Read the rest of this entry” link below for more.
As you enter there’s a big candy store area where there’s all sorts of old-school sugary stuff for sale that adults should not be eating. But it’s impressive particularly if you are under 12.
It’s hard to see the scale of what you are looking at, but this is a one pound cheeseburger made with twin 8oz burger patties. It is a very large burger, too big for a normal-sized person to eat. Chris and I split this monster in half. As burgers go I would have to say it was kind of ordinary after the novelty of its massiveness wore off. It was kind of uniformly grey in the middle, not particularly beefy in terms of flavor. It was just… BIG.
This is actually not the biggest cheeseburger here either, they have a triple 8-ounce cheeseburger platter called the “Titanic” as well.
The onion rings on the other hand which were arranged in a tower on top were actually very good, and you can order them just by themselves. I saw a whole bunch of Hammurabi-esque onion towers of Babel coming out of the pass that way, so it’s clearly a popular item.
The “Artillery Dog” is at least a pound in weight, and comes with all of the trimmings. Again, Chris and I who are both champion fressers had to split this thing. Both of us felt the dog was superior to the burger in every respect, it was a nice firm beef dog with a good amount of spices in it. As we understand, this hot dog is custom made for Jaxson’s, but I’m unsure of the supplier.
Clearly this is the biggest wiener that either Chris or I have ever seen in our lives. That’s what she said.
The cone of french fries.
The wives decided to eat some more normal-sized stuff, but even the regular sandwiches are pretty big. This was the tuna salad sandwich on marble rye.
Chris’s wife got the turkey burger. As turkey burgers go, it actually looked pretty good.
One of Chris’ teenage kids ordered the corned beef sandwich. Pretty sure he inhaled it. I love the little potato pancakes on top, that’s a nice touch.
On to the main event, the ice cream. Jaxson’s makes all of its flavors in house and has all sorts of giant sundae creations you can order, including something called “The Kitchen Sink” which is actually served… in a sink. Unless you’ve got ten people to eat the thing, I strongly suggest you do not order one of those.
Chris’s wife ordered something normal-sized, which is entirely possible here. Probably the most sensible thing to do.
This is a cola float with vanilla ice cream and fresh whipped cream. It is big. The cola that is used is actually Jaxson’s own formula, they don’t have Coca-Cola or Pepsi here.
Chris and I actually decided to get stupid and ordered the “Chocolate-Peanut Gargantuan” which is crunchy peanut butter ice cream “swimming in a goblet of hot peanut butter and chocolate fudge, chopped peanuts, chocolate chips, banana and whipped cream” with a cherry on top.
This is far more ice cream than any two people could ever hope to eat, especially after consuming around a pound of meat each. This required assistance from the spousal units and children to even try to put a dent in it.
Fun food, awesome ice cream and great company aside, I think the best part of the visit was getting to meet Monroe Udell, who has owned and operated Jaxson’s for 53 years. If South Florida can claim having its own Willy Wonka, that person would have to be Mr. Udell, who despite his 85 years of youth maintains a watchful eye over everything and is still sharp as a tack. I hope he stays with us for years to come.