I recall a song that Rachel and I wrote a few years ago:
Chinese Food for Christmas
Sing along to the tune of “Good King Wenceslas” (midi: Midi Music (Click), original lyrics: good_king_wenceslas
Many Jews eat Chinese food
During Christmas evenin’
All the restaurants are closed
Except those which are Asian.
Kung Pao Chicken, Egg Foo Yung
Lo Mein would be pleasin’
Beef and Broccoli, Peking Duck.
No-oh MSG-ee please!
As I eat my Pork Fried Rice,
Wonton Soup and Egg Rolls;
I thank G-d for Chinese food,
Especially the Shrimp Toast!
Grandparents’ solo or duet, Brooklyn/Yiddish accent:
“Don’t the Christmas lights look nice?
Beautifully they twinkle
Oy, I’m glad I’m not a goy,
Think of the e-lec-tric bill!”
Gentiles all are in their homes,
Drinking lots of egg nog.
Can we have more oolong tea,
Duck sauce and some mustard?
If there were no Chinese food
We would all go hungry.
Now to end our fine repast
With a fortune coo-oo-kie!
If this song got your juices flowing, here are some suggestions for your Christmas Chinese Food quest:
Lee’s Hawaiian Islander (Lyndhurst, NJ)
Chan’s Dragon Inn (Ridgefield, NJ)
China 46 (Ridgefield Park, NJ)
And if you guys aren’t all Latke’d-out by now, check out these awesome Yuca latkes by my friend Daisy Martinez! Be sure to wash it down with her Puerto Rican eggnog!
I want chinese food now.
I don’t know, but I think this “poem” offends me.
Sadly, us Jews here in Israel go to work….of course we can eat chinese food if we want to…but it isn’t all that here.
Leigh: Why? What’s offensive about it?
Wow, I thought everyone knew that Christmas was actually International-Jews-Go-To-The-Movies-And-Eat-Chinese-Food-Day.
Great rewrite, BTW.
Jason, I was also hoping to be sensitized in the matter of what’s offensive about your poem, but perhaps it’s not personal. Maybe it was only Leigh’s literary sense that was offended. ;-)
Apparently voted best Chinese restaurant in central jersey, anyone been there?
LING LING:
http://www.megueii.com/mhegueii/querydo.mhe?query_action=do_get_content&key1=MHE_122006E822B9A85C154DD7A584E3
They claim 3stars in Courier and Star Ledger.
Along the Devon Avenue section of Chicago, you can find a few kosher Chinese restaurants.
[...] What do Jews do on Christmas? We Eat Chinese Food. [...]